Physical abuse

Are You In an Abusive Relationship?

Are You In an Abusive Relationship? There are many levels of abuse. When people think of abusive relationships they often associate them with some kind of physical abuse.

Are You In an Abusive Relationship?

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” – Eleanor Roosevelt


There are many levels of abuse. When people think of abusive relationships they often associate them with some kind of physical abuse. Although physical abuse is one of the worst forms of an abusive relationship, abuse does not have to by physical, it comes in many disguises.

The different types of abusive relationships range from emotional, verbal, mental, sexual and physical or any combination of these. If you find yourself in an abusive relationship and you are trying to figure a way to get out, you need to proceed very carefully.

Some of the warning signs are:

* They blame you for everything, especially their anger or jealousy

* They are violent or they threaten you

* They control where you go, who you see and when

* They isolate you from all or most activities and friends

* They have bouts of uncontrollable emotional outbreaks

* They demean you, humiliate you, insult you, or embarrass you

* They make you feel insignificant and scared

* They force you to do things sexually

* They make you feel terrible about yourself

* You cause all the problems and they cause none of them

* And on and on

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Mental Abuse Information

Mental Abuse information –

Both men and women in  relationships, families and social circumstances can inflict mental abuse.

Stereotyped beliefs, myths and behaviour about roles for women and men  in families, relationships and social environments, and about what true love is,  are often at the root of mental abusive behaviour. Women in our culture are  often socialised to be accommodating, to believe that it is their job to care  for others at their own expense and to please men.

Men are often socialised to  believe that it is their job to protect women, to be in control at all times and  to “call the shots.” However often it is the reversal of these roles, which can  also cause mental abuse to be present for male survivors.

Both men and women in  relationships, families and social circumstances can inflict mental abuse. Stereotyped beliefs, myths and behaviour about roles for women and men  in families, relationships and social environments, and about what true love is,  are often at the root of mental abusive behaviour.

Many young  women and men believe that they must be in a relationship to be whole. They believe that they should devote themselves totally to their partner, often to the exclusion of other relationships and interests. Jealousy, possessiveness and  sometimes abuse, is seen as a sign of true love.

Believing that any relationship, even an abusive one, is better than no relationship at all, leaves individuals without the support that they need to leave an unhealthy relationship. Remember, mental abuse escalates. Mental abuse can and sometimes does, turn physical.

Fear and seeking help –

All types of abuse leave you frightened. The fear may not be limited to a fear for  physical safety. The fear can be more shapeless. You know you do not feel strong. You do not feel as if you can take risks. You do not even believe it is acceptable to try.

The abuse can start slowly, and perhaps not even feel  like abuse – just a simple “it’s all your fault” here and there.

Be warned that  mental abuse is often the precursor to more.

Unfortunately the classic tale  of mental abuse is often followed by physical abuse, and then sexual abuse. And  typically the cycle is that the abuser, at some point, apologies for the abuse. Then comes the honeymoon period during which things are relatively fine – and then the abuse starts all over again.

People who have grown up in abusive homes can easily duplicate those experiences in their adult lives. If you grew up in an abusive family, you know how frightening and hurtful the experience was. Do all you can to protect yourself and your children in the way that your  family did not or could not when you were a child?

If you were the victim of abuse as a child – you know only too well how much that hurt – you do not have to re-enact your childhood pain in your adult life. You do not have to treat others as you were treated.

Typically abuse, once begun, only escalates. Unless the abuser accepts responsibility for his/her behaviour and seeks  professional help – it is quite likely the abuse will continue and worsen.

There is help. There is support. No one deserves to be frightened,  terrorized or helped to feel hopeless and helpless about themselves and their  lives. The police, support networks and shelters take mental abuse just as  seriously as physical abuse.

HANSM– About the Author:

How To Recognize When You’re Emotionally Abusing Yourself

Recognizing emotional abuse is not always easy and as a result it has often times been overlooked because we have been programmed to focus on physical abuse.  However, before physical abuse takes place a person or the parties involved have been emotionally abusing themselves and each other for some time.  The emotional abuse is what happens first, then the verbal abuse, and then the physical abuse.  While all three kinds of abuse are unacceptable the worst of all these abuse is the emotional abuse because it has to be solidly in effect in order for the other two to occur and to have any effect.  A relationship either hasabuse two emotionally healthy individuals or two emotionally unhealthy individuals.  A combination of one healthy person and one unhealthy person does not exist in a relationship.  We have also been programmed to think that not only are men the ones who are the abusers but also if they are abusing their partner, then they are the scum of the earth, cruel and that their partner is the victim.  However, that is not accurate.  Women have also been the ones abusing men.  Sadly, they are both victims.  In light of recent events in the news regarding two well-known celebrities, domestic violence is once again in the limelight.  Unfortunately, the two individuals involved are too young to understand the impact their childhood has had on them.  This is why it is important as adults to grow ourselves internally before we begin to have children.  Growing up around any kind of abuse results in children becoming abusive themselves whether to themselves or to others.   It is especially worse if the children themselves suffered sexual abuse, verbal abuse, emotional abuse and physical abuse.  The abusive behavior stems from low self-esteem, feelings of unworthiness and a deep self-hatred.  With all the toxic emotions churning around inside, left unresolved it will result in individuals either falling into a catatonic state of depression or they lash out to anyone.  Instead of judging people who behave in a particular way, learn to understand that they maybe dealing with emotional turmoil, which they do not know how to handle.  Unfortunately, it is difficult to know the extent of the effects until one is involved in a love relationship.

Article sourced Angel Shadows Blog
Read full article here
http://www.createyourpassion.com/How-To-Recognize-When-You-Are-Emotionally-Abusing-Yourself.html

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